JUST ANOTHER MANIC MONDAY....

Heading into the second week of June, only three teams in the SLAM League had winning records—HMA/RAMSA, SS and PCF/HH—who combined for a 12-1 start to their seasons. All three teams lost on the Great Lawn on Monday night. In the immortal words of Vince Lombardi: “What the hell’s goin’ on out here?”

Perennial playoff stalwarts, Gensler and Fox+Fowle (who only had one win combined as the calendar switched to June) have appeared to right the ship as they flexed their muscles on Monday in defeat of another pair of playoff regulars in SOM/Swanke and PCF/HH respectively. In doing so, both GA and FXF climbed their way back to .500 each at 2-2 on the season. RRA/DBB, owners of an already impressive victory over Gensler on their resume, added yet another by defeating the defending champions 2-1 in 9 hard-fought innings of exciting SLAM softball. With the victory, RRA/DBB also climbed up to .500 creating quite the logjam in the standings.

Following Monday’s mayhem, PEA rebounded nicely from a loss to Gensler by knocking off KPF—the team which stood 5th in the standings heading into the night. So if you’re keeping score at home, 4 of the top 5 teams in the standings have all lost this week, with the team currently fourth, MGA, set to play on Thursday evening against GSA. If this week’s results are any indication (or if you could wager on SLAM league games), I’d bet the house on Gruzen.

As it stands, there are now five teams at .500 on the season, with three more teams only one game away from reaching .500 (sorry, Ennead. But what you lack in wins this season is made up for tenfold in blog posts!). What it all means—beyond a potential playoff nightmare of tiebreakers for the commissioner’s office—is that things are starting to get VERY interesting in SLAM and should make for quite a competitive summer.

As LeBron said: It's now or never. Oops.

Ennead Loses in 2 parts

The Ennead Gazette

Editor in Disbelief: Adam “can’t catch’em” Mead

Special Double Issue, Mid Morning Edition

Something’s come in pairs, this kind ain’t something you can wear.

Tuesday May 10 6:00 Eastern Standard Time; 42° 50' N; 73° 60' W

Several dozen high school boys cover what is to be our softball field. Tempers flare as we “pull” our permits and tell them to scram. The adolescent rage was palpable. This was high stakes architecture league softball. We need our field! Team Ennead took the field again KPF, the titans if midtown. What followed will be talked about in the back alleys of the west village for dog years. We jumped out to an early lead, only to be reined back into a tie. This would play out over 7 innings. Natasha was playing for two, at 2^nd base. She made some magnificent plays that kept us close, still in the race. But as 7 O’clock the hour hand neared, the game was called, ending in a tie, everything we had feared. We had flown too close the sun of a win, and found are true level. Sitting side saddle at the bar, we ordered our usual. Hey look over there, it’s a bronze bust of Stan Musial. Final Score 8-8. Raising our record to a sour 0-3-1

Monday May 22 5:30 Eastern Standard Time; 40° 47' N; 73° 58' W

The Smoke had just begun to clear from the post rapture, humility hung heavy in the air. Clouds colored 40% grey forming a flat non committal evening day. The Phillips Group (TPG) came in their brand new blue jersey’s, brandishing attitude something close to verisimilitude. We shook off the attempt at intimidation, if the rapture would not happen, maybe there was hope for reincarnation. We would take to our bats first, and flex some muscle, and if need be take the field to the tune of “do the hustle.” TPG came out swinging, 5 runs, 4 horsemen of the apocalypse they was bringin’. Team Ennead has learned about as much as you can in 3 loses and a tie, and as the runs amassed against us we waved the chance at a win goodbye. 5 more runs across the bases did come. Constance swung her bat, and Matt did run, if not all of us, then they would at least get 1 run. The games end came quickly, called after 4 innings, 14-1, in defeat rather sickly. But as is our way, we raised our heads high, necks angled towards the sky, and as the muscles tighten, it was our wallets that were lightened, as we washed away defeat, with bud light, and chicken wings minus the feet. Team Ennead stumbling into it’s by week at 0-4-1. Looking for some help from Oprah, and one of those teachable moments.

TPG Wins under the Power of 9

As the city saw it's ninth straight day with some level of rain, teams were not optimistic that yesterday's games would be played.  The commissioner was stressed.  Weather.com's local radar map was open on tabs across the city.  A 6 minute downpour on 34th Street and 10th ave led to a single one word ("oops") email by the league office that all but gave up hope for SLAM action on Monday, May 23rd.

But then there was the power of 9.  As has been well documented on this blog, Ennead Architects (EA) was named after 9 dieties coming together as one.  Perhaps those dieties fended off the rain and were the reason softball was played on this day.  The 5:30pm match up on the Great Lawn pitted EA against TPG Architecture (TPG), and something in the air (humidity, fog, deadlines in the office) was causing players to drop like flies.  Last minute cancellations and late in-house meetings led to a starting lineup of 9 vs. 9 as both teams took the field. 

The power of 9 was with TPG last night as they scored 5, 5, and 4 runs in the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd innings to take a commanding 14-1 lead going into the top of the 4th inning.  After three more EA outs, the game was over, final score 14-1, mercy by the power of 9.

Even David Solomon - our esteemed commissioner - came out to take in this game.  And his awesome videography skills (spygate anyone?) led to the above rare footage of an RBI single by TPG Manager Josh Ginsburg.

Game balls for this win go to everyone who showed up at the field on a day when it seemed nobody would (Thank you Derrick Blocker, Princess Salvacion, Adam Woods, Alison Hopke, Tony Franzese, Ray Dominguez, Justin Aharoni, David Beauchamp, Josh Ginsburg, and a late arrival by Omar Bustamante).

PCF/HH tosses GSA another loss....

....with the high arc hand of this man.

Say it Aint So....

Is this true, that SLAM is considering putting together an ALL STAR team to
play against the Men in Blue ? Well if this is only a rumor, then fine.

However, if the SLAM 'ALL STARTS' ever do want to place a legitimate challenge ( ha ) & bring back the Classic game back, please do let me know. All Female players interested in playing w/ the Men in Blue, need to submit there application directly to me.

I have a few phone calls to make. And please do remember that this Classic game is Umpired by
the SLAM players........AT NO CHARGE....: )

KING BLUE

BREAKING NEWS - Multiple Division Format

ABBOTTABAD, PAKISTAN....

During a secret meeting of the S.L.A.M. Intelligence Agency (SIA), Commissioner David Solomon proposed a radical new structure for the future of our softball league.  The attendees of this meeting have not been identified, but sources confirm that S.L.A.M. is considering a new multiple division format for 2012 and beyond.  The growing discrepancy in skills among teams in our league has prompted SIA leadership to suggest a dramatic overhaul in the regular season schedule and playoff format.

When asked for comment, HM/RAMSA Manager David Solomon told our source "It's just not fun anymore.  We have won all three of our games by at least 11 runs, so why even bother playing?  With our upcoming match against lightweight Gensler, there just does not seem to be an end in sight."

Coming off their brutal 16-4 loss againt RAMSA, TPG Manager Josh Ginsburg added "We had no chance against them.  With the way they are playing, I don't think anyone can beat them".

The new proposed divisional structure would allow the best teams to play among themselves while the rest of the league has a full season worth of fun, competitive games.  Our source viewed a copy of the confidential memo distributed during the SIA meeting titled "Divisional Structure, what it means to you!".  The details are as follows:

DIVISION A
Holzman Moss / Robert A.M. Stern Architects (HM/RAMSA)

DIVISION B
Ennead Architects (EA)
FXFowle Architects (FXF)
Gensler Associates (GA)
Gruzen Samton (GSA)
Kohn Pedersen Fox Architects (KPF)
Mitchell Giurgola Architects (MGA)
Pei Cobb Freed / Hart Howerton (PCF/HH)
Perkins Eastman (PEA)
Ronnette Riley / Davis Brody Bond (RRA/DBB)
SOM / SHCA (SS)
TPG Architecture (TPG)

Each team would play 10 regular season games followed by a playoff bracket, but only against other teams in their division.  At the end of the season, two trophies would be awarded - one to the winner of Division A, and the other to the winner of Division B.

When asked for a final comment, David Solomon told our source "Now that's a system that makes sense.  We (HM/RAMSA) are the only ones who can beat ourselves, so playing 10 games against ourselves is the best way to insure a season of fun and competitive games.  This is a win-win situation, we get our trophy at the end of the year, and all of the other teams still have a chance to get one themselves".

THE MOUTH IS SILENCED! (FOR NOW)

Following a swirling controversy as to the authenticity of the previous day’s Twitter posts, a newly outfitted TPG team took to the field on beautiful May 9th evening and tried to let their play do the talking against the defending league champs. In the end however, their mouths—much like their bats—were silenced by a suffocating defense and an offense that is clicking on all cylinders.

To his credit, the eye of this Blue Storm controversy – Derrick “The Mouth” Blocker – came out firing in the first inning, literally, as he struck out 2 of the first 3 batters to start the game. TPG mounted a threat in the bottom of the inning getting two runners on but failed to break through against HMA/RAMSA. Both pitchers settled in nicely until the top of the fourth inning as the Orange bats came out swinging and built upon their slim 1-0 lead.

Following two hits from the top of the order to start the fourth inning , cleanup hitter Brian Barney (2-4, 5 RBI) drove them both home with a rope up the middle, nearly decapitating The Mouth (seen below). The inning continued as HMA/RAMSA batted around and took a commanding 7-0 lead. The fireworks continued in the fifth inning as 4 more runs crossed the plate, the final 3 of which came off the bat of comeback player of the year candidate, Josh Aisenberg (3-4, 5 RBI) who hit a rocket shot to right field for a three-run HR.

The scoreless streak for opponents reached 12 consecutive innings, spanning 2.5 games to start the season, but finally TPG broke through in the bottom of the 5th inning with four runs of their own to avoid a mercied defeat. The game would end 2 innings later as HMA/RAMSA took home the victory by a final score of 16-4. Much to this writer's surprised Derrick Blocker would not return calls when asked about the outcome of this game. Conversely, when asked about his team’s play that afternoon Mike “The Situation” (3-4, 1 RBI, 4 runs) humbly offered up “Not for nuthin’, but we had a situation going on earlier today. It’s hard for me to look this good and play this good at the same time—but I pull it off, dawg. Now if you excuse me, I see a cutie who’s DTF…..”

Next up (weather permitting, of course): The Big Red Machine....Game on!